Dear Amahlia- 3 months old

Dear Amahlia,
Its been 12 months that you have been with me. In all that time I have spent 1 night away from you. That was the night I was stuck in bed after my spinal after having you. Gee it killed me you not being with me that night, I was sooo pissed the midwives wouldn't let me go in a wheelchair to see you and be with you. I shed soooooo many tears. Every night since then you have slept with me in my hands. EVERY night. I know soon I am going to have to make you sleep in your own bed, but I do love snuggling with you every night, more than I have admitted to anyone. Your father is missing me sleeping with him, I have been sleeping in Zacks bed with you, and Zack with dad as I am scared your father may lie on you.

You are such a smiley girl. You give everyone a smile, you happily make everyone happy as you give them a smile. You see me and your eyes light up and give me a huge smile. I don't even  have to work for it. It just melts my heart. Every morning you wake me up with you squirming I look down at you and you are looking at me and you give me the hugest smile, it makes the beginning of my days perfect.

You watch the boys play, taking it all in. They love you so much and you love them just as much. Zack is ALWAYS cuddling and kissing you. Squeezing you so tight. 95% of the time you take it in your stride, the other 5 % you whinge telling him to leave you alone as he does it to your 1000 times a day. Ash is a bit more laid back as he is younger. Although when he sees you he always says "hey" and has to put a hand on you. He also pat pats you when you are crying like I do trying to make you stop or gives you a kiss on the head. He has also tried to share some food with you making me jump yelling no at him as he tries to put it in your mouth.

You are such a big talker. You coo at anyone who talks to you. So many people comment on it. Its mighty cute. Its like you have this big story to tell us and you talk away.

 Still 3 months on I can't believe how much hair you have. I do really love that you have hair. I was happy that the boys had very little hair, but you being a girl needs to have hair. Although it does just stick right up at the moment. It isn't long enough to lie down, its so cute my gorgeous girl.

You are my precious girl. I love you so much.
Love Mum xxxooo

Dear Zackarie 4 years 6 months

Dear Zackarie,
You melt my heart. You are such a sweety. You love your brother and sister soooo much. I love that you will show how much you love people and don't hold that no emotion boy thing that so many boys have. I hope you keep that. Amahlia is just hugged to death, you are forever hugging her around the head. You always have your face in her face talking to her, you kiss her, when she cries you try to stop her, its just adorable. Although it means that she has caught every bug you have had because you can't stay away, but the love is just so strong. You love your brother to and give him the sneaky kiss and hug but not near as much as your sister. I think you would if he would allow it but he has no time for that he is too busy.

You have your Mondays with Manly nan. She told me on Monday she was in playing the nintendo with you and you just gave her a kiss. She said it melted her heart. She told me she loves her time alone with you. On Monday when I was going you said you were staying and I said you better ask nan if you can. You pipe up with Nan you will stay with me won't you LOL. We had to laugh. She loves you helping her out with the gardening etc. Then there is me you ALWAYS give me kisses and hugs and I just LOVE it. I would never turn down your hugs or kisses.

Your favourite thing to do is go to Manly nan and pops. You wait all day for Pop to get home. Sometimes it can be a very long wait. The way your eyes light up and you run to him when he comes to get you is beautiful. You love going down to the "Kangaroo yards" (sale yards) with pop and you run up and down the mounds of dirt. You can spend hours down there with pop. You have pop wrapped around your little finger anything you ask or do he gives in. He can be soooo tired or his back could be killing him but he always gives into you and Ashton. I can tell it can be killing him and I will say no Zack pop is tired and he always pipes up with no its ok. Today you brought a picture home from Preschool for Pop of you two playing football. Written under it is I like my pop he plays football with me. Killer dog is also a favourite of yours and Ashtons. It is where Pop crawls around the ground chancing you being a killer dog. Its quite amuzing as you both giggle and scream. AND of course you love to wresting with him.

Wrestling is all ok with pop but when you have to do it with your brother is when it worries me. It all starts out fun and games but someone always gets hurt and since Ashton is the little one it is usually him. You can make your father and I very cross with it because no matter how much we say leave your brother alone you continue to do so. Pushing, tackling, throwing him down. I REALLY don't know how he hasn't been really hurt yet because you are soooo rough with him.

Playing games like angry birds and stupid zombies on my phone is also a very popular thing for you at the moment. You spend AGES on my phone playing it. You are very good at them to much better than I am.

You are starting to get interested in learning your letters and numbers now too which makes me happy. We have the reading egg games and you enjoy playing them. I have decided to hold you back from school and you will go when you are 5, so you won't be the baby of the year instead you will be one of the oldest. I think an extra year at preschool will help you get your confidence up more.

Your least favourite thing to do at the moment is go to Eel nan and pops (Cronins). Your father tricks you into going which makes me cranky but you are starting to wake up to him. Doesn't help usually because then he forces you to go down. The other day when Eel nan was here you hid from her and wouldn't come out. I don't know what happens down there but I hate making you go down because I know it must be something since you are so adiment that you are not going there.

You still jump like a Kangaroo just like you have since the day you could jump. You especially do it when you are excited. Its funny you could be lying on the ground playing a game on my phone and the next minute you jump up, jumping up and down. Its so funny. BUT it can drive me mad as it wakes your sister up. I ask you to stop but you can't help it, its just something you do without realising it.

Zack I love you so very much. Never loose your caring, loving nature.

Photo's from us today!